If you think that being positive is the key to having a good life, you’re wrong. Yep, I said it.
Positive thinking alone won’t get you anywhere.
I’ve made two observations that brought me to the conclusion that thinking positive doesn’t really have a huge impact on your life.
But what I noticed with myself and others, is that my positive thinking doesn’t really help much if I'm still running around like a crazy woman trying to do a million things at once, still trying to control every step my son takes and feeling exhausted at the end of the day.
So I asked myself…
Why am I trying to do a million things at once? Why can’t I be satisfied with things left undone?
I was tapping on all of these things and what I became aware of was this:
Being stressed is the manifestation of a deep-seated belief of mine, that there is never enough time.
So I asked myself, “Not enough time for what exactly?”
My honest answer was: There is never enough time to do all the things that will bring me to a better, more abundant, more successful life, to finally become someone who is important and worth listening to.
Holy shit! What I’ve tried to cover up with all of my positive thinking were these core beliefs:
I am not successful.
I am not abundant.
I am not important.
I am not worth listening to.
If I truly believe that I AM all of these things, why would I need TIME to achieve it?
Take a deep breath and let that sink in.
You attract what you truly feel about yourself, not what you tell yourself or others. Words are far less powerful than feelings. If you feel abundant, you will attract abundance. If you tell yourself “Oh yeah, I’m feeling good, I’m pretty abundant”, but these words don’t match up with your core feelings, they won’t have a long-term impact on your life.
Putting a band-aid on in the form of a positive affirmation on your negative beliefs obviously won't work. You can’t think a few positive thoughts and therefore change the negative programming that is running in the back of your mind and that has been imprinted on you perhaps for decades.
Bruce Lipton, stem cell biologist and bestselling author of The Biology of Belief says that we're only aware of 5% of our entire thoughts. The remaining 95% are unconscious and they’re the ones that run the whole show. If you want to know more about your beliefs and unconscious thoughts, he says, you just need to look at your life. If you’re not satisfied with what you see, you can be sure that your subconscious thoughts are mostly negative.
So instead of forcing yourself to be positive and covering your wounds with positive thinking, it’s more important to get aware of the core beliefs you have about yourself by being present and observing your daily thoughts, words and actions.
The moment you shine light on what you truly think you are, like for example, “I’m not worth listening to” is the moment you will realize “Wait a minute, this might not be true at all.” With this awareness you suddenly start relaxing and you notice, "Hey, I am enough. The future can’t bring me success, abundance and self worth.”
It doesn’t make sense to stress out and force yourself into a place of peace and joy.
That’s a contradiction in itself.
These days being stressed seems to be the norm and people connect being stressed with being successful, where in reality it’s pure insanity.
So in case you’ve tried positive thinking, but you’re still not satisfied with how you feel on a daily basis or you’re even struggling with physical pain, try to calm down and watch your thoughts, maybe start a daily meditation routine. Don’t force yourself to be positive! Allow your negativity to bubble up, but try to really watch the voice inside. What is it telling you?
Spend some time every day alone and be brave enough to have a look at your inner world. Be conscious of your surroundings; enhance your sense perceptions by fully descending into your body. Smell, taste, touch with your full attention. Becoming more present with your surroundings needs some practice, but it will help you to become more aware of your thoughts as well.
Once you become aware of your negative thinking patterns, they will slowly lose their grip on you. Your interactions with other people will change, your work environment might change and your circles of friends might change. People might be puzzled at what’s going on with you because new beliefs about yourself will form over time and they will influence all of your actions and reactions. Your old patterns might still come up from time to time, maybe even stronger than before, but it’s sure to be the beginning of the end of an old way of living.
Stay awake. Stay present and accept your dark side.
Positivity will flow from you naturally after you’ve allowed your inner wounds to come to the surface.
Love you guys,
By the way, in my Reset Your Life Course, which is a 3-week online program, I'm teaching exactly how to get out of your old patterns of thinking and behaving. It's a big part of the whole course. And I can tell you from my own experience: You can have the biggest vision and be super clear about your purpose, but if you're sabotaging yourself the whole time with negative core-beliefs about yourself and you don't even know that you have them, you will never achieve what you want.
I'm working on my negative beliefs every day. It's a never ending process. It's like cleaning your house. You can't just do it once and then you're fine. The Reset Your Life Course will teach you about the 5 biggest self-sabotages that are hindering you from becoming the person you're supposed to be.
This online-course will only be available until July 1st 2016. If you wanna know what's your true purpose in this lifetime and you're longing for a job that is fun and exciting, but you have no idea how to get there, find out more about the course here.
There is a different way of living. You don't have to work hard and spend the rest of you life in a job you don't like just to pay your bills.
Be brave. Be you and dare to go your own way!
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